Mediochre at Best (perfume)

Mediochre at Best - For the average looking woMan - was the name of Elphaba Vaher's perfume range. Targeted at those suffering from verdigritis, Vaher was inspired by her own troubles and negative experiences faced as a result of racism towards her green skin. It was the first green eau de parfum, and was said to smell bitter.

Background
The fragrance was intended to tone down verdigritis with its ochre undertones, while promoting a feeling of euphoria, calm and positivity. Which it did, as well as promoting jealousy, envy, short temper and uncontrollable levitation.

The fragrance was noted for its wicked aroma, smelling of green apples, lemons and bitterness.

Legal Issues
The scent was pulled from the market after toxic quantities of belladonna were found in the ingredients list. In lieu of specifying the exact amount, Vaher opted to write "traces of" on the label. When questioned about the lethal effects prolonged use of her scent could cause, Vaher replied:

"It's supposed to make you feel beautiful so I put belladonna in it cos bella means beautiful, and I thought the more beauty the better obviously. What a stupid question, you stupid IDIOT"

Statistics
The product was found to be an aphrodisiac amongst interdimensional travellers, with record numbers of single mothers being reported after consuming the perfume.

Current Status
Vaher later commented she was working on re-releasing the product, with the aim of destroying all rival perfumes. It was noted she turned visibly green during the press release.