Tamika Brown

Tamika Brown (c.1565 - 29th August 1584) was an African Vaherian slave woman turned concubine who is most famous for being the "crew-do" on board the Golden Mermaid. She sailed with Captain O Rly to the new world and was present for the discovery of the Fugmoor coastline, shortly after which she fell overboard and drowned in the area known as Brown's Bay - named in her honour.

Early Life
Not much is known about Tamika's early life. Being illiterate and destitute Tamika never kept any accounts or journals and is not mentioned in history until her name is added to the Crew List for the Golden Mermaid.

Time on the Golden Mermaid
Tamika is listed on the Crew List as the "Crew-Do" implying she was there to relieve the seamen's sexual tensions. Her age is listed as ' "19"? '. Later entries into the ship's log throw more speculation upon her real age. It is known that whilst onboard Tamika could never persuade the Captain to sleep with her, despite her best efforts:

"Once again tonight the woman named Tamika threw herselphe at me, her bosoms exposed and heaving - this lead me to cast further doubte on her age as surely no lass of 19 can have so wrinkled a bust? Determined to access what was within my breeches, the lusty wench was a flurry of hands, stopping only when I gave a swift pull to her woven hair."

Tamika endured the months at sea, passing the time by working her way through the beds of most of the crew members on board. Brown became a useful asset to the crew when she singlehandedly shot and killed the entirety of an invading pirate crew. As a reward she was allowed to take her pick of their treasure, choosing a variety of jewellery which she wore at all times.

Death
After months at sea, the lookout in the crow's nest shouted to those on deck: "Land ho!" "Whatchu call me?" was the swift reply from Tamika, who was quick to anger when she felt her reputation as a lady was being called into dispute. It was at this moment as she began to climb towards the crow's nest to beat the lookout upside his head, that the ship gave a judder and plowed into the rocks off the coast in Brown's Bay. Tamika was thrown overboard where, weighed down by her jewels and unable to swim, she drowned. Making a last-ditch attempt to save her life Tamika took off her heaviest piece - the Dope Diamond, and threw it back onto the ship. It is for this reason the jewel survives to this day, the rest went down with her.

Memorial
As no body was recovered there is no grave of Tamika's to visit. There is a memorial plinth on the clifftop at Brown's Bay dedicated to Tamika, which was erected by the crew on the Golden Mermaid. It says:

"Tamika Brown went down near this spot. She held a lot of semen. Then she sank beneath the waves - Rest in Peace in your watery grave."

Due to the wording on the memorial, people often mistake Tamika Brown as the name of a ship lost at sea.

A secondary memorial plaque was erected in the harbour at Brown's Bay in 1984 as part of the 400th anniversary of the town, but this was deemed offensive and triggering by the local P.T.A who did not see why one drowning victim should be singled out above the others.

Tamika Brown is the name of the 2003 death-metal album recorded by the local band "SLaya".

Role in the Dope Diamond Myth
Tamika had a great eye for jewels, claiming one pilfered necklace as her own and demanding to wear it when posing for her portrait by an unknown seaman. The necklace became known as the Dope DIamond due to the green coloured diamonds used in its construction. After her death the necklace was put aside as a gift to be sent to Lettuce Knolyss by the Captain, upon the Golden Mermaid's return to Vaheria his final wish was carried out, however the necklace became a symbol of tragedy and was rarely worn by Knolyss, who became convinced it was cursed by the angry spirit of Tamika. The Dope Diamond passed in and out of history leaving tragedy in its wake. Today it is stored in the Vault of Vaheria and is viewable to the public.